Bury your head in the sand!
Sure, the baby’s cute.
But the birth bit, yikes!
For many women (and their partners), fear is so integral in our birth culture.
And understandably so. For many years, we have simply forgotten how birth works best.
You won’t have to go too far before you hear a story of someone who didn’t have a great time whilst giving birth.
They tell you perhaps to lower your expectations, to prepare you for the worst or to warn you of the dangers.
Or maybe, it’s simply an outlet to release their own hurt.
Whatever their motives, these stories perpetuate a culture of fear. Birth becomes something to be feared or endured, rather than enjoyed.
What Could Have Been Different?
But we can look at their stories and reflect on what might have been different.
Often, we find things went on that did not enable the process to happen as it was meant to.
Chances are they were disturbed in some way.
This affects the delicate balance of hormones we need to make giving birth run smoothly.
Perhaps she really wanted to use a birth pool but there wasn’t one available, or she had one but it was left to get too cold.
Maybe one of the midwives was too abrupt or was unkind or made her doubt herself.
Was she put under pressure by hospital protocol to perform to a timescale her body or her baby wasn’t ready for?
When giving birth doesn’t work out the way a woman envisaged, women blame themselves.
They blame their bodies, they blame the universe but chances are, it was the system failed them.
How Can The System Be To Blame?
When attempting to figure out what happened, the following questions can be illuminating…
Was the environment she was in during labour and birth conducive to the birth process?
Was her birth partner prepared and able to create the hormones necessary to allow the birth process to work?
Did she feel safe and secure throughout labour and birth (so necessary in order to create the right hormones to make birth progress effectively)
Did she feel continuously supported throughout labour and birth by someone whom she felt was on her side?
And the answer, to at least one of those questions, is almost always no. Something happened creating an intrusion that had an effect on the birthing woman’s mindset enabling the birthing process to not work as it should.
Understand How Birth Works
A hypnobirthing course gives you a full picture of how you can support yourself to give birth.
Knowledge is power and preparation is key. I can think of no other time where women being informed is so essential.
Or maybe that’s just because I’m so passionate about women being aware of their options and the choices available to them.
Giving birth is an amazing feat requiring strength of mind, focus and concentration.
We must give ourselves to the process and surrender to the sensations. Getting our minds out of the way so we can allow our bodies to do what they need to really helps.
Those of us who teach birth empowerment in the UK as a living (i.e. teaching hypnobirthing or other ante-natal preparation) walk a fine line. To get the best out of the system we are provided with, we must equip women with the right information, tools and knowledge.
Helping women understand how birth works and how to best support themselves through childbirth is my mission.
Removing the fear and myths surrounding the birthing process is essential.
Encouraging women to have empowered births is so important.
Important not just to those women but to society at large.
When women ask questions and question the routine procedures we have accepted for too long, they learn to be empowered.
When women learn tools to stay calm and relaxed, they teach it to their children and to their friends and the world becomes a better place.
If you’d like to learn KG Hypnobirthing in Manchester, Cheshire or Stockport (or via Skype), feel free to get in touch for more info or to book in.