When I found out through Hypnobirthing and a few wise women I was fortunate to encounter whilst pregnant that birth could be different, I knew I was going to invest my time and energy into making this happen.
Ensuring my baby’s smooth passage into this world was important to me. I was going to do everything I could to make it happen. I wanted to give my baby every chance I would BE THERE when she arrived.
Being alert and present was important to me.
I wanted to be there to hold her skin to skin and let her know we loved her, to thank her for coming to us and let her know we would always do our best by her.
Few People Know This
Few people know this but growing up, my view of childbirth was less than positive. The anxiety I felt came partly from my mother who hadn’t had such a great time birthing me (despite taking all the drugs!) No-one helped her prepare.
Her very charismatic obstetrician had told her ‘not to worry’ and that HE would take care of everything.
She just wasn’t prepared or in control.
Her doctor was.
She was happy to do it his way because no-one told her that being a part of what was going on might help her feel more empowered.
She went to him partly because she’d heard he was the best and this was her way.
It was all very medicalised and she went into it being happy with that.
Having her baby in ‘as natural a way as possible’ just wasn’t her thing.
She hadn’t practiced her breathing.
In fact, she didn’t even know the physiology of why breathing calmly and deeply and evenly might help.
She had no mental tools to manage the sensations. She was frightened and didn’t know what was happening.
It wasn’t a great start to my life or her experience of parenting.
In addition, she got a hospital acquired infection and ended up staying in for 2 1/2 weeks with me separated from her in the hospital nursery.
Watching a video in a school biology lesson of a woman giving birth did nothing to ease my anxieties either. In fact, I think they played it as some kind of contraception! The woman lying flat on her back on a hospital bed. She didn’t look like she was having such a great time.
I just didn’t question the ‘kind of birth’ she was having; I just accepted that was birth.
And yet we know that lying flat on your back reduces the space your baby has to get out by up to 30%! This is why being in upright positions like ‘on all fours’ or squatting are easier positions to give birth in.
Being on your back is rarely a position a woman would choose for herself.
Being in other positions and being able to move around is far more comfortable and the movement helps to ease baby down.
So when I found out that birth didn’t need to be like that, that there WAS another way, I was amazed. Watching my first calm ‘hypnobirth’, I was just blown away. I was so grateful to the women who allowed their hypnobirths to be filmed to help me prepare for a different kind of experience.
I knew that if birth could be prepared for, I was going to do all I could to achieve it. For me, learning to ‘Hypnobirth’ and the path that set me on was the answer.
Neither of my baby’s births were easy. They required concentration and focus beyond anything I’d done before.
But the experiences were incredibly empowering and my memories are warm.
I am grateful to the women who shared their positive stories and showed me a different way.
Sometimes women who want these kinds of experiences, don’t know anyone else who has had them.
And this is why I now tell my story and teach KG Hypnobirthing, to help other mums and dads to be feel empowered during the births of their babies. I want you to have the best birth possible, to be aware of your options and to make the choices that are right for you and your baby. You’re choices will be different to the next woman because we are all individuals. I have no invested interest in what you choose, only that you’re well informed and in the knowledge that what you choose is the right thing for you”
Feel free to join my free Facebook group, the Birth You In Love Share Shack.
Feel free to share your story.
Ask any questions you may have.
I have ONE space for a private hypnobirthing couple starting next week and ONE space for the week commencing 7th August. Bookings now being taken for my KG Hypnobirthing Group course in Flixton in September.